watch

I was reading PW today and her "Top Movies" contest got me thinking about movies, and I realized just how much I love them. I seriously love movies. I love epics, love stories, dramas. I do enjoy a good, intelligent romantic comedy.

I wanted to think through my favorite movies - there are several... I can't pick one.

Lord of the Rings - I feel like this one is an obvious choice. I totally went through my LotR nerd phase in college. I remember when I was truly first introduced to the idea of it. I was at a movie with my friend, Elisa, when we saw the first teaser trailer for Fellowship of the Ring. It was a black screen that showed the flaming ring with the words "One ring to rule them all. One ring to find them. One ring to bring them all, and in the darkness bind them." I got chills. My mom read The Hobbit to us growing up, and we saw the cartoons, but the story hadn't made much of an impact on me. I think my age was a factor. Anyways, needless to say I was caught up instantly. I read the trilogy, and the Silmarillion. I read the appendices. I got into it. :) It was a fun phase.



Harry Potter - This was my next big obsession. I read the seventh book in 36 hours. I know people that totally had me beat, but I'm still proud of my accomplishment. Of course, I know now just how much time I had on my hands. :) It's amazing the perspective a child brings to your life.

I really did enjoy this epic series. More than I thought I would. I'm excited to read it to Andrew. I think I'll read each book as it grows with him. I'll start when he's 11 and we'll work through it. I hope reading aloud is a major part of our family life. I enjoyed it in my family, and hope to pass along the tradition.

But, this is about movies! I saw the 4th movie, Goblet of Fire before I read any of the books or saw any of the previous movies. I was hooked. The first one is probably my favorite one, with the 4th and 6th ones being close contenders. The others were ok... but the series itself is so great.

Love Actually - This one is probably a bit more controversial... mainly because of the amount of nudity. :) But, it's one of my most favorite movies of all time. It's feel-good at it's best. The soundtrack is fabulous. I love British humor. I love all of the actors. I love the theme of it.

A&E's Pride and Prejudice - I've landed on this as being my favorite version of this Jane Austen classic. I love the more contemporary, shorter version of it as well, but there's nothing to compare to this 6 hour mini-series. The portrayal of Elizabeth Bennet by Jennifer Ehle is, in my opinion, flawless. Colin Firth as Mr. Darcy? DROOL. Big time.

Almost Famous - I forget about this movie. I forget how truly amazing it is. And then it resurfaces and I'm blown away again by just how fabulous it is. I love how I'm surprised by it's existence and feel like I'm almost enjoying it for the first time again. Music... travelling musicians... people trying to live out their dreams, or just figure them out... Fantastic.

Once - I don't know if I'll watch this movie again... but it was a beautiful experience watching it. The soundtrack is by far my favorite original soundtrack. My friend Danielle brought this over randomly and said (in her very casual way) "Um, have you seen this?"
"No, but I've heard it's good and I've wanted to."
"You haven't seen this?!?" (She's not nearly as animated as me, so when she got all flustered, I knew this was serious business.)
"No! Let's!" (Or something to that effect.)

It was OK, until Glen Hansard belted out his song "Say it to Me Now". I was hooked. Everything from that point on was genius. If you haven't seen it, you should.

Sex and the City 1&2  - I love SATC. Years ago, Adam and I went to NYC with some fun friends of ours, Ryan and Denise. Denise was WAY into SATC. I remember her talking about how much she loved it and how she wanted to do a tour of their filming locations... I thought she was crazy. Until I started watching it. I was hooked.

Yes, it's racy... at best. It's gratuitous. And, it's feminine. It's fashion. It's relationship. It's vulnerability. It's just great. In my opinion!



This was by far one of the most fun posts I have ever written... for me. You should go watch one of these movies. Don't blame me for all of the nudity in some of them though. Don't worry - I cover my eyes too. :)

trust

I'm feeling a little sad today. Sad for failed relationships, heartache, sick children... just unfairness and hurt in general. Why so melancholy? I don't know. I just am.

For the first time ever, I cried about having to take Andrew to someone else instead of being able to care for him full-time myself. Now, the person who cares for him is one of the absolute best possible people - my wonderful mom-in-law. I love that he gets to spend that time with her. But, it still breaks my heart that I have to. I just wish I didn't have to do it. I think I was feeling especially bad about it yesterday because Andrew's been dealing with just general yuck as he adjusts to new food, and teethes, and is becoming more mobile. It's hard to watch him grow and experience the pain that goes with it.

Oh yes. I'm emotional. I even had chocolate earlier and I'm still emotional and sad! Amazing.

And then I think about a couple at our church, Rachel and Jeremy. I can't even begin to describe the heartache I feel for them. I can't imagine the tremendous pain and... probably anger and confusion. They have an absolutely adorable son named Asher who's dealing with CF. Now, they're pregnant with their second son, Paxon, and not only does he also have CF, but he also has a chromosomal disorder that could potentially take his life at a very young age. Even just typing that out makes me cry... crying out of the intense desire to make it right for them... crying in anger that this had to happen to them... crying for what will come.

I think about these things, and it inevitably brings me back to God. Why would He allow this? Why? Why is there so much suffering that is even more traumatic than this??? My rational response - when I'm speaking at myself - is to say "It's not God's fault... it's sin." And, I know this is true. God isn't playing around with us. God isn't evil, or ill-intentioned. But, I realize that as I answer with my pat, I-go-to-church-every-Sunday answer... I realize that I never allow myself to wrestle with truth. To experience the seeming injustice of illness in a child who hasn't even been born. The injustice of failed marriages and broken families. I go to my comfortable answers and am afraid to look deeper. I'm afraid of jumping off the edge and into the murky waters of doubt. I think I'm afraid I'll drown. I'm afraid that by asking questions, I'll somehow lose something. Maybe I'm afraid that God will be angry at me for questioning Him... or He'll take me around the world showing me His great works like He did with Job. "Who are you?" He'd ask. "Who are you to question me?"

But, I want to. I want to question. Or maybe I don't. It's scary. I want to trust Him. I want my questions to lead me to a deeper understanding of His character - His goodness. Although... just being really honest... it doesn't seem like a whole lot of goodness right now.

In all reality though, I know that I have to find child-care for Andrew because of the foolish financial decisions that Adam and I have made. Our consequence is that we don't get to have quite the family life we wanted. We chose to spend unwisely, so that's our lot. It's logical. It makes sense. And, in light of the fact that it's our sin that landed us here, it's amazing that we have it so good - consequentially speaking. And, Rachel and Jeremy can find comfort in God. I don't know how He'll do it. I don't know what He's going to do in their lives... but I know that He's good. And His goodness as their Father and Comforter will manifest itself in their lives in some way. I pray outright for the healing of this unborn baby boy. I pray for a big mistake made by all of these doctors. And, if he isn't healed, then I trust that Rachel and Jeremy will rejoice to meet Paxon again when they also meet Jesus face-to-face.

I think the most comforting thing I can think of is that we won't be crying anymore in Heaven.

my diet...

... consists mainly of Sour Patch Kids and these delightfully wonderful Ghiradelli chocolates my husband brought me from San Fransisco. Don't I have a totally wonderful husband?? He opened his bag and showed me a totally cute onesie he bought for Andrew, and I ooo'd and aahhhh'd over it. Then, he pulled out this large GORGEOUS bag of dark chocolate raspberry squares. I about died and went to heaven, snatching at them eagerly, exclaiming "I love you! I love you! I love you!" That's when he pulled out bag number two - milk chocolate squares with caramel. I almost started crying with happiness. "Oh my gosh! Oh my gosh! You DIDN'T!!"

Then he did it.

He made me cry. Because of chocolate.

He pulled out bag numero tres - milk chocolate with peanut butter. I cried. And rejoiced. And danced. Then I stopped dancing because deep down I was like "is my belly fat shaking??" So, I stopped.

But these chocolates are amazing. And, you'd be surprised to know that I haven't eaten all three bags yet! I'm saving them like precious treasures. The only reason I'm able to do this is because I purchased half a month's income in sweets for our trip before I knew about said chocolates. I even avoided buying chocolate thinking that it would just melt in the car. I changed my mind.

Oh! Our trip! It was delightful. We drove over 2000 miles total, took lots of pictures, and laughed about things that my mother would blush to know that we laughed about. :) And my mom doesn't blush at anything except too much... um.... humor about things like bodily functions, and "bedroom talk". Anyways, we had a really great time. We did hike for about 4 hours on Saturday in the rockies - it was so beautiful. Our hike was a 3 mile round-trip hike, going uphill the entire way there, and downhill on the way back. Our trip back was about half the time that our trip in was. Also, I was horrified to discover on our return to the hotel that our hike was considered "easy to moderate". If that was easy?!?! Then I'm... just... speechless. Because it was anything BUT easy, people. I actually think that I had a hard time getting started because I had a bit of altitude sickness. I drank tons of water and walked super slow. Lots of elderly people and small children passed by me with looks of pity. After a bit I started to feel better, and was able to move along nicely. I gave myself little internal pep-talks like "Just one step at a time. You can do this." and imagining myself as this totally B.A. hiker girl who does this thing all the time! I started to imagine what my hiking wardrobe would look like, which of my friends I would hike with on a regular basis... my imagination went wild. You'd think I'd be admiring the gorgeous landscape, the larger-than-life mountains, the picturesque lakes... well, sure. I was thinking about them too... when I was taking pictures and imagining that I was a professional photographer, hiking to remote locations to take award winning pictures of the Rocky Mountains.

Yeah. I know. You don't have to tell me that I should've stopped being Anne Shirley at least 10 years ago.

Anyways, the only thing about the trip that I could come close to complaining about was my own brain. I was so out of it. Since the beginning of my pregnancy with Andrew, my brain has vacated the premises. I can no longer engage in rational thought, pay attention for more than .5 second, or understand subtle wit. Too bad. Part of the problem this caused was my less than stellar navigation, and I also decided to format the memory card in my camera. I thought to myself "there's nothing important on here..." and bam! Gone. Pictures, videos, all gone. In a flash. I said "Ok, all better." and Adam was like "What do you mean 'it's all better'?"

"I formatted my card."

"You WHAT?!? Tell me you're joking."

"No... there wasn't anything on there."

"No, except for the 20 pictures you just took while we were stopped at that scenic outlook..."

In honor of former "WOW" jargon... "/facepalm"

However, my hero, Adam, recovered all those pictures for me, and saved the day. Isn't he the best ever? Not only did he save all my photos from death-by-airhead, but he also bought me chocolates. I simply adore him.

confessions...

... just because it's late at night and Andrew's sleeping and Adam's out of town. I'm spilling my guts. And I'm going to use bullet points, because they're fun... and it's the only method of organizing that I feel like using at the moment.

I would like to confess that...

• I haven't cleaned my bathroom toilet in a century. Almost.
• I think there's a thing of sour cream in my fridge that's got a June expiration date on it.
• There's an inch of dust on my pianos.
• There's a spoon in my dishwasher that's been in there for ages because I keep running it through in the hopes that the spoon will magically get clean one of these days.
• I bought space-bags off an infomercial with good intentions. They're still sitting in a box in my living room.
• I consider Kona's swimming in the pool as her "getting a bath".
• I have an empty container of lotion on my desk that's been there for at least a year.
• The top drawer in my nightstand hasn't been gone through since I was 16 years old. Which was almost 14 years ago.
• I'm having a melt-down now realizing how old I am...

Time for bed.

no excuses!

I have no excuses to not clean my house today. None at all. Except...

• Except, I have to write this very important blog post.
• And, I have to eat these strawberries I got on sale at Sprout's yesterday.
• And I have to dress Andrew in cute outfit #2 for the day.
• Oh, I also have to watch my dvr'd episodes of The Choir.
• Oh, and I must sit at the piano playing half of at least a dozen songs, stopping in the middle of one song only to start another. (I usually do this because I realize how badly the song I was playing sucked, so I start another only to realize that that one sucks as well.)
• Then there's my pre-pregnancy clothes in my closet - mini fashion show? I mean, I need to know what fits me, right?
• By then, it'll be time for Andrew's 3rd cute outfit of the day.
• I must eat popcorn after. I've been making it in olive oil, with kosher salt & rosemary. Can you say "Yuummmmmmmm!" Sing it out like you're an opera star!

So yeah. Cleaning my house? Who has time for that??

hopelessly addicted

... to Real Housewives & Bethenny. So, the reason I'm admitting this to the whole world is because the title of my previous post is "a new start". For those other fans of RHWNJ, who does that remind you of?? :)

I'm totally addicted to Bethenny's show as well. In fact, I need to finish watching last night's episode! I love that her baby's name is Bryn. It's one of my favorite names, actually! I imagine Bethenny and I have a special connection because our babies were born so close together. (*snicker*) I was kinda at the point where I was thinking "Hey, I might be ok with doing this again!" and then after watching her labor episode, I was brought back to my senses. I saw her dealing with a contraction and it all came flooding back. Uh... no thanks. Not yet.

The exciting event for the week was that Andrew rolled over for the first time! He went from tummy to back. I was completely thrilled!! So, that's the update for today. I'm going to go finish watching Bethenny, and then make some lunch.

Oh, the diet is going well. Although, I keep going over my points, so I need to kinda watch what I'm doing a little more. I need to be entering food as I eat it. Or entering it before I eat it! Just so that I know exactly where I'm at and how much room I have left. :)

a new start

I'm trying to get back into food blogging. Blogging about food. Blogging about failing at cooking food. It seriously makes me want to go to culinary school. I think that's my new dream. I want to go to school to learn to chop onions like a maniac and seer a scallop.

My little boy is the joy of my life. I told my husband that and he was a little hurt. Then I reminded him that Jesus is really the joy and love of my life, but that he was the second love, and Andrew was the second joy. I hope that made up for it. He didn't seem to mind my explanation. I love being a mother. I always knew I would love it, but I had no clue just how much I would love it. I love taking care of my family. I love being partners with Adam through all of this. I couldn't imagine a better friend to walk through life with. Andrew is way too cute for words. And I'm not just saying that because I'm biased! I'm for reals saying that it's a fact. He's friggin cute!

See!!!

I'm not lying!!

He's learning everything so quickly! I feel like everyday has new delights to behold! New surprises and wonders! It's such a treat to watch him learn all about this world we live in. Yes, I love being a mother to the cutest baby on the planet.

So, with said baby being so adorable, and me being so generally happy, it's easy to understand why I've actually put off any kind of weight loss attempt until now. Life's been too great!! And, while it's still great, I am fat. I have jigglies around my belly, and my thighs are tree trunks. So. The plan is to make a checklist for myself everyday this week of things I can do to slowly get into the swing of healthy eating/living. Tomorrow? I need to drink enough water and eat a good breakfast. I also need to make a meal plan for the week, but that's more of a to-do. So, water & breakfast. I would say that I want to try to work out, but I'm actually battling a cold at the moment, so I'm going to hold off on making that leap for a few days.

The idea is for me to use my other blog to document the recipes I use to lose weight. I'll be using Weight Watchers online, which I love. I'm also going to be using a lot of the principles from the South Beach Diet, as well as trying to eat most of my food for the day before 3pm. With so many changes, I thought it best to start slowly, and implement them as lifestyle changes over time, rather than going cold turkey.

So.... water, and breakfast! Goodnight!

new blog!

I've decided to venture into the world of food blogging - officially!

I'm not going to lie. It's not very good. But! Please help me! Read it, critique it, use it... whatever! I can go back to using this for personal reasons, which will be handy, especially when the little dude makes his appearance.

I even took photos. They're not good. :) But! I plan to improve. So, check it out, offer your feedback, post meal plans, etc.

Thanks all!

http://myclutteredkitchen.blogspot.com

leftovers

What's a girl to do when there's a baby shower's worth of leftovers in the fridge, PLUS all the other leftovers that come from a weekend of mostly eating out with the family??? Eat it, of course. My meal plan became null and void yesterday as Adam, my mom, and I threw all the leftover fruit, veggies, cookies, and cake into the fridge. I think a lot of random snacking is definitely in order. I made sure to freeze the berries and pineapple last night for future smoothies. I think I have about a month's worth of frozen berries at this point.

I suppose everything will just have to be shifted around! I am going to try a different produce solution this week. I'm thinking of ordering a bunch of lemons - I have many plans for lemons. I still have tons of apples left over from my basket over a week ago, which I'm thinking of making into apple sauce. I might even try canning for the first time! We'll see. I also have these adorable little limes and avocado that I need to use! I meant to try them over the weekend - but again, company in town + baby shower = more food than is good for us.

Back to eating for me.

meal plan 3/18

This week's meal plan was done on Tuesday and I ended up shopping for everything yesterday. A few things to note: I'm attempting to adjust our food budget. Adam's happy with this because I'm not trying to increase it. :) So, this week was my first attempt at trying to stay under $50 for the week. It worked! I don't count the purchases for yesterday's meal, because my meal plan for this week starts today. That's my story, and I'm sticking to it.

My meal plans are Thursday - Tuesday because I have time to shop on Wednesdays/Thursdays for the following week. Another thing - Wednesday is not included in our grocery budget yet for a few different reasons... so I'll give a more detailed break-down when we have a chance to work it out... not that everyone really cares about our budget or eating habits. But, you my friends are definitely a great source of accountability. :)

So, the meal plan:
Tonight - leftovers
Friday - BBQ Chicken Stuffed Baked Potatoes
Saturday Lunch - Chicken Fajitas w/ Guacamole
Saturday Dinner - out! (We have company in town this weekend)
Sunday - Chicken w/ Curry Dill Sauce & Rice (gotta use up all that dill!!!)
Monday - Homemade BBQ Chicken Pizza
Tuesday - out!
Wednesday - Lasagna w/ Homemade Vegetable Flatbread

It's going to be a huge challenge for me to attempt to maintain this budget, but I think that lots of prayer (discipline, please!!!) and lots of creative ideas on how to stretch meat or eating one or two meatless meals a week are going to help tremendously.

Again, feel free to post your meal plans or recipes! I could always use the inspiration, and it helps to know that someone's reading. :)

st. patrick's day

Today I made a somewhat genuine Irish feast. Too fun! My first step towards "faking" this meal was to buy a regular brisket instead of a corned beef - mistake numero uno. I also made a potato leek soup, which was outstanding, I must say, and Irish soda bread, which was also great!

Mistake #2 - I put the beef in the crock pot with the beer & seasoning. Yum! It started cooking, and the house started smelling really good. But, I forgot carrots at the store, which I intended to use instead of cabbage (again... "fake" Irish meal). So, Danielle graciously brought me a couple of bags.

Mistake #3 - I was trying to get my coffee grinder to work, and thought that perhaps I needed to reset my breaker. I did, and without realizing it, turned off my crock pot half-way through cooking the brisket. I didn't realize what I had done until 40 minutes before I was expected to serve dinner. I panicked! Rather than remember my handy-dandy pressure cooker, I freaked out and threw it in the oven.

Adam managed to save it by slicing it super thin - it didn't seem so tough that way. Luckily for me, the carrots, soup, and bread were all to die for (in my humble opinion), and made up for it. Also, someone brought a heavenly dessert - Death by Chocolate Cake. Seriously. So. Good.

So next time? Corned beef... not brisket. No turning off crockpots... I have a pressure cooker just in case! And... Adam will rescue me in the end if all else fails. :)

The recipe for the soup can be found here:
http://allrecipes.com/Recipe/Real-Potato-Leek-Soup/Detail.aspx

The recipe for the soda bread can be found here:
http://allrecipes.com/Recipe/Amazingly-Easy-Irish-Soda-Bread/Detail.aspx

Both are excellent!

a few different things...

I'm thinking of renaming my blog to "The Messy Kitchen". My kitchen has been perpetually messy for days now... weeks, really! I have my once-a-week big clean-up before our lifegroup on Wednesdays, but I'm lucky if I keep a load going in the dishwasher everyday. Cooking everything all the time in the kitchen is messy!!

Speaking of cooking...

I came up with a rough meal plan for next week last night, and also made some very fake "gyros" for dinner. They were ok. I'm not sure when I'll be making them again. I think I just need to rethink how I cook the beef. I made a brisket in the crock pot, and it was good, but way salty. I think I'll try some kind of round steak and sautee it in strips next time.

The meal I'm really looking forward to is tomorrow night's. :) I plan to make an "Irish" dinner in honor of St. Patty's Day. I am going to cook Guinness corned beef in the crock pot (yum!!!), potato leek soup, and soda bread! I'm super excited about this meal. I love potato soup, for starters, and I love bread! The beef's ok... I think the guys will be a little more excited about that than me.

I'm pretty happy with my upcoming meal plan. I wanted to try Kristie's approach by attempting to use the same thing all week long. I plan on making a bunch of chicken on Thursday or Friday and then just going to town for the rest of the week with different recipes. As soon as it's finalized, I'll post it. Make sure you post your's too! Again, I like to steal ideas and be inspired. :)

more grilled cheese

I made another sandwich last night with the brie - except I used strawberry preserves. Still soooo delish!

I received this recipe from a friend for another sandwich which I'm hoping to try soon! Thanks Durell! She said this comes from Rebar in Victoria (that's in Canada, silly Americans).



Cheddar Chutney Grilled Cheese with Green Apple and Watercress

8 slices of multigrain bread
2 tbsp butter
12 slices aged white cheddar cheese
4 tbsp Dijon mustard
1 Granny Smith apple, quartered and thinly sliced
1 bunch of watercress, washed and stemmed
1/2 cup of onion chutney

Onion Chutney:
2 tbsp butter
2 yellow onions, sliced and diced
1/2 tsp salt
1/2 tsp red chile flakes
1 tsp ground coriander
1 tsp brown sugar
4 tbsp apple cider vinegar
1/4 tsp cracked pepper

Heat butter in a pan over medium heat and add onions. Saute until translucent. Add salt, chile flakes, and coriander and continue to cook for 15 minutes. Add remaining ingredients and cook until the onions are very soft and creamy. Allow to cool.

• Butter one side of each bread slice. On the unbuttered side of 4 slices, spread Dijon mustard, and then layer the chutney, apple slices, cheddar, and watercress. Top with remaining slices, buttered side up.
• Heat a griddle or pan and cook sandwiches on both sides until the cheese is melted and the bread is toasted. Slice and enjoy!

roasted chicken with asparagus, eggplant, and mystery squash

I moved the roasted chicken & veggies dinner to last night. The reason being that I was nervous about the whole chicken sitting in my fridge. I didn't want it to go bad. Plus, all that fresh dill made me nervous too.

I made a dill butter by throwing three sticks of softened butter in a food processor along with lots of fresh dill and went to town. It was amazing. I used it to dress the chicken and used more fresh dill plus two crushed garlic cloves in the cavity of the bird. I roasted it at 350 degrees for 1 hour 15 minutes. It was amazing. Simply amazing.

I also used the asparagus we got (did I mention we got asparagus??), one of my mystery squashes, and the eggplant as my veggies. They were completely delicious, but I over-cooked them. Next time, I won't cook everything together - I'll wait to put the veggies in until later.

Anyways, this was the result - I didn't take pictures of the veggies, because even though they still tasted good, they looked pretty mushy. Oh yeah, I took pictures of my beautiful chicken. :)

My beautiful chicken!!! Aren't you proud of my picture? I think it might be over-exposed.

Oh well.

Does anyone know what this squash is?? This is my mystery squash. I'd appreciate any help!

grilled cheese sandwich & my freezing adventures

I found a recipe on Tasty Kitchen for a Turkey, Brie, and Apple Grilled Cheese sandwich. I love, love, love grilled cheese sandwiches. The brie caught my attention cause I also love the idea of using different cheeses other than american. I bought some brie at Costco on Thursday just hoping that I might get some apples or something else similar in my basket today.

Lo, and behold!!!

I got the most tasty organic apples anyone could ask for! So, I used my very unhealthy white bread and cut a big slice out of the brie and sliced up my apple. I used a corer/slicer, but the slices weren't quite thin enough for me, so I sliced three of them in half and that worked nicely. I don't have any deli turkey, but that was ok. I also didn't follow the recipe exactly because... well, I don't like a lot of ingredients, and there were a lot. I also don't have a panini maker or George Foreman, so I just used my spatula to press the bread in the pan while it toasted and the cheese melted. I also spread a super thin layer of mayo on the inside, although I have a feeling it could've done without.

The result is heaven! I could easily see this being both a breakfast and lunch sandwich. the combination of the apples and brie is delish, and making it into a toasted sandwich is even better! I had planned on making regular grilled cheese and using just normal canned tomato soup, but I didn't get the soup, and Adam's not home! So I get to be fancy. :)



BOUNTIFUL BASKET

I got some amazing stuff today. All organic, fresh, delicious looking produce. Albeit, some of it's a little scary since I haven't used it to cook anything. But, it's all put away now with the exception of some squash and an eggplant that I'll use for my roasted chicken & vegetables meal.

4 oranges
4 mangos
6 kiwi
8 apples
1 pineapple
2 kapocha squash
2 of some kind of mystery squash, which I'll use tonight, simply out of curiosity
1 eggplant
4 heads of romaine lettuce
1 leek
12 potatoes
dill

And a mexican pack, which included:
4 small green peppers
1 package of assorted dried peppers (no clue what to do with these!)
4 avocado
cilantro (lots and lots of cilantro)
1 onion
1 bulb of garlic
1 bunch of green onion
8 teeny weeny limes

I chopped and froze the green onion, froze most of the cilantro and the dill. I plan to use the rest of the cilantro this week, as well as make dill butter to use with my roasted chicken recipe. I'll freeze the rest, since I read that fresh dill doesn't last very long.

The avocado and mango needed to ripen more, so they're in brown bags on a shelf in my pantry. When the mangos ripen, I'll prepare 3 of them for freezing, and use the other one right away. I love mango!

I'm thinking I'll roast 3 of the small green peppers, puree them and add them to refried beans. The other one will be chopped up and put in guacamole. No clue what to do with the dried peppers. Anyone have any ideas?

I prepared and froze 4 of the kiwi, and plan to use the rest this week. I cut up the pineapple and seperated it into 4 baggies. I froze 3 of them, and plan to use the other this week - probably with the kiwi in yogurt or cottage cheese. YUM!!!

The leek was cut and cleaned in ice water, then dried with paper towels and thrown into the fridge. I plan to make a traditional Irish meal this Wednesday (Happy St. Patrick's Day!) instead of fajitas, and the leeks and potatoes will be perfect for a soup that I was hoping to make.

The things I didn't really need to mess with were the 1 Kabocha squash, the potatoes, apples, oranges... the lettuce was easy - it went in the fridge. I'll probably make a salad and give some away. Want some romaine lettuce?

fun projects

My room is looking a lot more "in process". There are no longer piles of books, random articles from my purse, baby magazines, and empty water bottles hiding under pillows and blankets and my winter coat that my dogs tore apart. (ugh.)

My really fun day begins shortly. My darling friend Danielle and I are going to head up to Knit Happens in Scottsdale to look at all the goodies! I think I'm going to make a granny square afghan for Andrew. I like granny squares because you just work on one at a time.

Also, if you make meal plans, you should post them in my comments section! I want to know what you're all making for dinner! Plus, it would help me feel a little less self-conscious for posting mine AND maybe I can steal some of your ideas!

meal plan

I've noticed that it's pretty popular for Foodie bloggers to post weekly meal plans. Not that I'm technically a "foodie" blogger, but I'm definitely obsessed with cooking at the moment.

So here goes:
Friday: Meatball sandwiches w/ caprese salad & cheesy garlic biscuits
Saturday: Chicken & Veggie/Mushroom Risotto
Sunday: Beef Gyros & french fries (yummmmm - this is a new recipe I'm trying)
Monday: Roasted whole chicken & veggies
Tuesday: eat out
Wednesday: Chicken Fajitas w/ refried beans & something else
Thursday: leftovers

I chose this menu based on the fact that I already had some ground beef to make the meatballs, and I'll be trying Bountiful Baskets one more time. I want to see what kinds of veggies I get and incorporate those into a couple of dishes this week. I intend to freeze the rest - I'm going to try the blanch/shock thing for the first time! Yikes! I figured whole chickens are inexpensive and I love roasted whole chicken. So does Adam. Roasted veggies are also crazy good. I ended up having most of the ingredients I need to make this stuff, or anticipate getting most of the veggies I need for the meals I've planned. If not, I guess I'll be substituting a lot!

gourmet chef?? that's a negative

I attempted making hollandaise sauce this morning - as I attempted to make Eggs Benedict. I broiled the english muffins, the canadian bacon, and poached myself a few eggs... and tried to make the sauce. I think my attempts at hollandaise will have to be spaced out a bit. I can't believe how much butter I used this morning. It was enough to give the healthiest person a heart attack. And the EGGS. Oh my gosh, the eggs.

I made one for Adam as well. The brave guy tried to eat it, but gave up after two bites. Not only does he not like "egg mcmuffin type things", but I have a feeling the tremendous amount of cholesterol didn't help either. He's now helping himself to a nice bowl of fruit loops. Despite the sauce not being exactly what I wanted, it still wasn't bad - for someone who loves Eggs Benedict.

The problem with the sauce is that it just simply wasn't thick enough. It basically looked like slightly thickened hot butter. Like... melted butter without the greasy look... opaque. I'm back on the recipe websites trying to figure out what the heck I did wrong and hopefully - when I feel like experimenting with an entire box of butter again - I'll learn from my mistakes and get it right, or better, next time.

nursery day

It is my goal to get this boy's bedroom into shape today. I wanted to go to Ikea, which I may still do, to look for curtains - and maybe a cute stuffed puppy. I have help arriving early this afternoon. We must remove boxes, and I'm hoping to pick up some drawer organizers for all of his little socks, onsies, burp cloths... even a small shoe organizer for his closet - he officially has more shoes than me... and he's still kicking my ribs. I think he liked my pancakes from this morning. :)

Adam's out on a photography day trip with some seventen'ers. They're headed up to Prescott and Jerome to exercise their photo skillz. When Andrew has vacated the premesis, I definitely plan on getting out my little Canon point-and-shoot camera and pretending to be just as cool as the rest of them with their Nikon fancy-shmancies and big Canon 30F's. :P

Hey! I have a macro setting!!!

The other fun feature is the video setting. I fully intend to use it and post short random videos of all the cool things Andrew does - I'm fully aware that there are maybe 5 people in the world who will watch those videos with the same awe and fascination that I will, but that's ok. I'm sure his future fiance will love videos of his potty adventures, his first soccer game, and playing in the pool with Dad.

my new love...

is this website: thepioneerwoman.com

Seriously. in. love.

I love her stories, her pictures, her recipes... I love everything about it. Also, I find myself, for the first time, reading someone else's romance story and loving my own even more, rather than wishing for their's. (i.e. Mr. Darcy - drool!!!)

I think one of the things I'm really liking about it is that when Adam and I first got married, I wasn't what you'd call a "bad cook"... I just... didn't pay attention. Or have a lot of creative ideas to draw from. I would cook for him, and... well, let's just say we both made some major mistakes. I made things way too salty, and he made the fatal mistake of saying "I prefer my own" after trying my mashed potatoes. Eventually, he started helping more in the kitchen - I actually married him for his cheesecake recipe, truth be told. And, really... it hasn't been until recently that I've really honestly tried to cook well. It's helped that I've found recipes of my own that he loves. He loves my meatloaf, and my roasted chicken with potatoes, and chicken marsala... so, we're getting there!!!

I love reading about her journey, cause she basically went from broiling unmarinated steak (I should say burning) to making a cookbook and hosting a recipe site. If that isn't inspiration, I don't know what is!! Ok, back to reading her blog now.

I love my husband.

That's really all I want to say today. I love him and feel so blessed to be married to him.

Now off to look at recliners and rocking chair pads. :)

Day 1

I woke up late this morning, and was already thinking "mmmmmm Starbucks!!!!" Ugh. It took me a few minutes to build up the resolve to not go. I told pretty much everyone via this lovely blog that I was going to NOT go to Starbucks, so I'd better not go. So, I contemplated what my alternatives were, and if I even had anything in the house that I wanted to eat, or how many of the items in my pantry had iffy expiration dates. So, I went to the corner market in search of coffee mate and cereal.

I walked away with some healthy cereal that made me feel better about my decision, the coffee mate, some apple bread which is soooooo stinking good, and a bunch of other stuff.

I also managed to do some meal planning for the first time in over a month and grocery shopped. I usually fall into the trap of thinking that I'd better have plenty of snack foods in the house if I'm to stay away from eating out, though. So, I have lots of stuff to snack on, breakfast food, and dinner ideas... lunch will just happen, I'm sure, but tons of snacks too. Not all good. I'm hoping that this adventure will help me to balance what I know I should have in my house, as well as prepare better. I want to develop some good habits for later on!! So, day 1 was successful on some fronts, and I'm sure I'll be able to do better next week when planning out my snack needs. :)

still deciding...

on whether or not to do the whole "lent" thing. I'm not catholic, and I've never done it before, but this year I was thinking that it might be a good excuse to take advantage of the next 40 days to eliminate something from my life. Adam and I have been discussing budgeting woes... it's hard going from being a 2-income, 2 people family - who seriously can do almost anything if we really wanted to - to being a 3 person family... thinking about income and what that's going to look like. We'll definitely make sacrifices we've never had to before, and I think a lot of those will be easier than I think they will be.

One of our major downfalls is eating out. In fact, I would say that's our most major downfall overall. I don't love grocery shopping... or meal planning. I don't love cooking. I don't hate any of these things either, but I go back and forth between being really good about it and skipping a few weeks... or months... whatever. :)

So, I'm thinking I'll give up eating out for Lent. Entirely. No more Starbucks runs in the morning... no more spontaneous Flancer's french fries runs, no more wings from Buffalo Wild Wings on a friday night... just good meal planning and homemade meals from now until Easter. I think it'll be a good thing. I'm a little tardy getting started... but I'm gonna do it anyways. :)

Praying...

James 1:5 - If any of you lacks wisdom, he should ask God, who gives generously to all without finding fault, and it will be given to him.

So, I'm asking for wisdom - a big, healthy dose of wisdom. And opportunity too.

I can't tell you how many times within the last few months I've felt like fasting would be a great thing to be able to do, but I don't think Andrew would appreciate it very much. :) So, I'll stick with some heavy duty prayer for now. It's so great to be reminded of how big our God really is. How rich His love... His mercy. I really don't get His plan a lot of the time, and every once and awhile a situation arises that I just simply can't fathom. He's totally in control of the "uncontrolable". He's capable of great things. I just pray that I can get out of the way and just be joyful that I can even be a small part of a great work that He's doing.

Love the vague post? :) I'll bet you do!!

The Day Before

Tomorrow is Adam's knee surgery. It's minor - just a scope to repair his torn ligament and clean out some other stuff... I wanna say bone spurs, but I could be wrong. He called me earlier to tell me that the time of his surgery was moved from 9am to 12:30pm. That's good because the 9am time would've had us checking in at the surgery center in north Scottsdale at 7:30am - meaning a 6:30am departure from the house. Yuck - especially since I can't seem to haul my caboose out of bed any earlier than 7:30 or even 8am these days.

My sleep is obviously disrupted, and I'm so blessed... BEYOND blessed... that I have a schedule that allows me to be the bum I want to be, but still keeps me occupied so that I'm not going crazy with boredom. I'm relishing these last days of being able to just lay in bed because it feels better than getting up. I know it won't last long. :) Soon I'll have a little baby boy demanding to be fed and cuddled and loved on and talked to and... it's all very exciting. :D

So... Adam's surgery...

"Gabby", a very helpful medical person, dropped off some equipment that Adam will be using during his recovery. One item is a machine that he's supposed to use 6 hours a day - not sleeping. It keeps his knee in constant motion, and exercising it so that it will bend properly. We're starting at 45 degrees, and will be working our way up to 120 degrees over the next few weeks. They also gave us a non-ice cold therapy thingy. It basically circulates a very cold water/alcohol solution through this pad on his knee. He will wear that while he sleeps. It's actually pretty cool! Of course, she needed to show me how to use this stuff, so imagine me on the floor with my huge belly as she's putting my leg into these different contraptions so that I'll be able to show Adam tonight. My back was not happy.

Nila and Amanda are going to come hang out with me during the procedure, which will be fun, and then we get to go home, and I'll be in charge of getting his perscriptions and helping him get comfy at home. And then we'll watch tv and sleep! :) Our favorite activities at the moment. I'll make sure to post regarding the outcome and let you all know how he's doing tomorrow. Thanks for your prayers for both of us!

Ignorance is Bliss!!!

I watched a live birth video last night. Like, a real video showing a full on birth. Let me just say... ignorance really truly is bliss. I went to bed feeling a little discouraged, but I guess lots of women over the ages have gone through all that... I'm sure it'll be fine. :)

Soooo, the big events for this and last week are the Lost season premier, and Adam's knee surgery this Thursday. We watched Lost after seven:ten and, while Adam remains stubbornly unimpressed, I was LOVING the season premier. I have all kinds of theories, and more unanswered questions than I can count. But, isn't that what makes it so great?? :)

The surgery to repair his meniscus in his left knee has both Adam and I a little apprehensive. We, or I should say He, along with Amanda, made a mad dash this last weekend to finish painting the nursery and pick up Andrew's furniture (Thanks Mom and Dad!! And thanks to Scott, Mindy, and Amanda for helping us to bring it home.) The room is totally adorable, and I'll make sure to post a couple of pics once we have the stuff in there. The carpet is currently drying, because when we removed the few things we had in there, we realized how badly it needed to be cleaned. Baby preparations have been pretty much like this since the beginning of January. We have a crazy busy weekend full of stuff, and then we wait. It's a lot like planning our wedding all over again! We get a lot done, and then we wait... and then we do more, and then we wait again. Although, this time I don't mind waiting nearly as much. Being sick a couple of weeks ago really took it out of me. I use most of my energy to work and do a few things around here, and then I need to rest and do nothing - besides the fact that my sleep just isn't what it used to be. :) Between the four midnight runs to the bathroom and Andrew playing soccer as I'm trying to fall back asleep, it's made for an interesting sleep schedule. :)

So, pray for us as we live through Adam's recovery (supposedly about 6 weeks) and get through baby showers and out of town visitors and maternity leave preparations... all that fun stuff. :) Should make for a very interesting and quick 10 weeks!

Something's gotta give

But what?? What's going to happen when this little guy gets here? I keep thinking of what I have going on right now... teaching, working at the church, trying to keep my house in order... what's life going to look like when Adam and I have this little bundle thrown in there? I know people keep telling me that we'll figure it out, and that some things will give way, but what? Looking at the way things are right now, it's hard to see what is negotiable and what isn't. Are Adam and I going to have laundry folding parties on Saturday mornings? Am I going to have a screaming baby while I'm trying to go over flashcards with a student? Will my house become even MORE of a dustpit than it already is... which honestly would drive me up the wall the most, I think.

I will say that if my house isn't vacuumed and things aren't dusted, I feel like everything's falling apart. The kitchen too, probably. If the kitchen seems out of control... yikes! Will that all change? Will I care that my house looks like a disaster recovery area? Will I feel like a bad wife?

All this makes me wanna take a nap.

A life outside the checklist

When I was on college staff at another church, we were asked to take a survey of our spiritual walks before going on a staff retreat. You had to fill one out, and three other people close to you also had to fill it out. At the retreat, I remember spending about 5 minutes discussing areas of strength, and the rest of the retreat discussing our weaknesses and our battle plans to overcome those weaknesses in our lives. I couldn't explain why at the time, but I remember feeling utterly defeated, useless... like I could never measure up. I guess that's a good thing, when balanced with a view of God's unfailing grace, but I have to admit that I didn't understand that about God. I didn't understand how His grace really was sufficient to cover my weakness, how He makes us strong in Him for His purposes, not for ours'.

I've been thinking about that a lot lately, because an overwhelming area of weakness for me was "Joy". I didn't have enough, according to this survey. Also, when I was trying to figure out my plan of attack against my joyless life, I really had no idea what a joy-filled life was supposed to look like. Was I supposed to read lots of spiritual books and feel excited by them? Was I supposed to find that living a Godly life was suddenly easy - even with trials? I really had no clue. I also didn't really understand how you could evaluate joy, and I think it's mainly because I just didn't understand what it was or where it came from. Over the years, as God has taken me on this amazing journey discovering Him, He's showed me just what joy looks like - at least, what it looks like so far in my life. Also, He showed me where it comes from. So, over time I was slowly released from this bondage of feeling like I had to somehow manufacture this joy for myself so that I could be more obedient to God, and starting living in the freedom that He offers under His gospel and experience joy as a result of living in that gospel!

All this to give a brief explanation about some of the feelings I've been having lately. I've found over the last year especially that joy is contentment. God used this period of waiting to conceive Andrew to show me that it's really heartbreaking to place hope in circumstances. I spent years waiting to get pregnant, and felt like I had no purpose in the meantime. I made no plans unless they fit in with my "I'm gonna be a mom someday" plan - which, believe me, I don't think there's anything fundamentally wrong with that, except that I was placing hope in my circumstances, rather that in the gospel. Early last year I found myself asking questions... questions like "What if? What if I never get pregnant? What if we are never able to have kids? What then? What am I supposed to do? How will I deal with that? Will my broken heart ever be ok? Does that mean I'm being punished? Is God waiting for me to do something different?" So many, many questions... and I needed to answer them all over time.

I wrestled through a lot of crap last year, and part of that involved realizing that having children - as wonderful as that is - wasn't the answer for my life. Only God is. He's the only One that satisfies. He proved over and over that the things in this world will fail me. I can hope in a job, in my marriage, in my family, in friends... but eventually they will fail. I was in this process of figuring out what it was that God wanted me to do instead. I was trying to understand that I could have joy even in the midst of this pain.

Well, the great news is, we are now pregnant. It's great news, but it's amazing how even now that joy is still under attack! When I first found out I was pregnant, I felt guilty about a lot of things that were going on in my life at that time. I was sure God was going to take this new little baby away from me to punish me for being unfaithful to Him. I felt like I didn't deserve to have this amazing gift. God used that to show me that He doesn't punish us, and that every moment I have with this baby was a gift. Instead of living in fear, He taught me to live being thankful for each moment that I had, whether that were cut shorter than I would like or not.

It continues to remain under attack as I watch good people suffer from pregnancy and infant loss. Why would God give me such an amazing gift when I feel like there are other people that deserve it so much more? Again, the lies that Satan tells only serve to rob the joy that God wants me to experience in Him. Whatever happens, it's for His glory and ultimately for my enjoyment in Him. Instead of living in fear and doubt, I need to remember His promises for my good... and that doesn't necessarily imply a "good life" or good circumstances. That doesn't mean that things will turn out the way I planned when I dreamed of my fairytale future. It just means that life really does suck sometimes, and when we get to Heaven, it's gonna be so much better. And while we're here, we can experience the joy of living in His grace every single day.